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Happy Birthday, James!!!!! 2021

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James   

Thanks Susie!...very kind of you.

And because I´m a guy, like many other selfless people in history, who prefers to give on his own birthday, as opposed to receiving, I have created, and now gifting, to you 
guys a new poem, a special birtthay edition poem, written by me. Here it is:

It´s James´ birthday,
Is he getting long in the tooth?
On the contrary, at 62,
He´s finding the fountain of youth.


James, 2021

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James   

..and for the 3 billion females of the world, here´s one for you:

You have good tastes,
It´s why you dig James.
He at 22, 62 or 102,
Red hot will burn your flames.


James, 2021
(copyright ec.com, and James, 1st edition)...I have to add this copyright, otherwise Eric Carmen, or some other lurking artist, will probably steal my words for a new song. Anyway..
 

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First of all, James...Happy birthday to you and to one of my favorite internet friends in the world...It is with that sentiment that I have decided to take your latest works and bring them to my Yale intelligencia and get a true reading on its merits and platitudes...

I have been feeling guilty for quite awhile now, panning your latest works...Is it entirely possible that my caustic remarks about your “new stuff” not being as good as your “old stuff” is rooted in some other deep-seeded emotional involvement?...Is it possible that I am wracked with jealousy and pain over the Lewisa defection?...Am I in denial that the women of the world don’t see my “hunkiness” on the same level as the King’s???...(I do have a valid point, for I was a world renowned member of that famous dance troup, the “Chubbydales” which doesn’t seem to hold any weight with the female members here)...

Therefore, I decided to consult a panel of impartial experts at Yale...I will be presenting your latest works to a triumvirate of scholars, Dr Phil Osophy,  Dr. Clara Net and Prof. Plum(I don’t have a “CLUE” why he was included)...

BUT, I need to get an assurance from you that we will both abide by their critiques...If they say it’s junk, then junk it is...If they put James in the Plato, Socrates, Frost milieu, then congratulations...

I am willing to take a chance, once and for all, for a valid evaluation of your works...

Is your money where your mouth is?

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Happy Birthday to you, I nearly forgot
Asked Lew what to give you, he told me squat
But we love you here so don't be a jerk
Have a White Castle burger and keep up the good work

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Kirk   

Roses are red

The harem is dead

James at sixty two

is twenty three skidoo...

 

 

 

 

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James   
18 hours ago, Lew Bundles said:

First of all, James...Happy birthday to you and to one of my favorite internet friends in the world...It is with that sentiment that I have decided to take your latest works and bring them to my Yale intelligencia and get a true reading on its merits and platitudes...

I have been feeling guilty for quite awhile now, panning your latest works...Is it entirely possible that my caustic remarks about your “new stuff” not being as good as your “old stuff” is rooted in some other deep-seeded emotional involvement?...Is it possible that I am wracked with jealousy and pain over the Lewisa defection?...Am I in denial that the women of the world don’t see my “hunkiness” on the same level as the King’s???...(I do have a valid point, for I was a world renowned member of that famous dance troup, the “Chubbydales” which doesn’t seem to hold any weight with the female members here)...

Therefore, I decided to consult a panel of impartial experts at Yale...I will be presenting your latest works to a triumvirate of scholars, Dr Phil Osophy,  Dr. Clara Net and Prof. Plum(I don’t have a “CLUE” why he was included)...

BUT, I need to get an assurance from you that we will both abide by their critiques...If they say it’s junk, then junk it is...If they put James in the Plato, Socrates, Frost milieu, then congratulations...

I am willing to take a chance, once and for all, for a valid evaluation of your works...

Is your money where your mouth is?

Lew, college professors in 2021 don't like guys like me, ie guys who chicks dig. Sadly it's true. Professor dudes are jealous and think I'm an uncouth fascist. Professor chicks want some action, and when it is denied to them (professor chicks are normally over 19)....well you know, the saying about a woman scorned.

So the answer is no. As in everything in life, especially in 2021, I must be the ultimate judge of my thoughts, actions and creations. And in the case of the above 2 poems, written by me, they are excellent. In fact they are likely to make it into the upcoming compilation tentatively titled "The Best of James poems , as posted on ec.com".

Yes it's true. We're putting together a best of James' poems compilation. Though Amazon has already banned it ahead of it's publication. They say it discriminates against guys (and the other 12,896,342 genders)....who don't got what it takes to be James (have a harem, write intelligent poetry etc.). Amazon has also investigated the James Harem Charter, and interviewed it's members, and have concluded that The James Harem must be banned also for the fact that the harem practices discrimination against non females, and that within the female gender, the harem practices discrimination based on hotness. It noted that each member is hot, and that thus there is discrimination in play against females who are not hot. And that this discrimination is a blatant infraction of their policies regarding fairness.

When I protested this decision by Amazon, they told me I'd have to submit a report covering the years 1650 to 2021, proving the James Harem never benefited from the institution of slavery, directly or indirectly. Amazon said it adopted this new policy after seeing how well it worked in Chicago, where it scared away the best of Chicago's vendors and suppliers.

So we've decided to market the compilation through the only sane and honest institution left in America: Strip Clubs.

Another thing Lew, if you and Vinnie ever make Trusk/Bundles 2024 a reality, I will let you use some of my poems, for FREE, if you'd like to include them in your campaign speeches. You are welcome in advance.

Anyway Lew, what was the question?   : )

 

I

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James   

Raspathens yeah, I too am glad we could all re connect. And glad you are posting. You're smart as heck and one of my fave members here.

Kirk, I was getting into your poem, until I got to line 4, when I realized your post must be a coded message to your online pandilla. : )

P.S.   thanks you guys for the birthday wishes!

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Kirk   

23 skidoo (sometimes 23 skiddoo) is an American slang phrase popularized during the early 20th century. It generally refers to leaving quickly, being forced to leave quickly by someone else, or taking advantage of a propitious opportunity to leave. (from Wikipedia)

:D

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22 hours ago, James said:

Lew, college professors in 2021 don't like guys like me, ie guys who chicks dig. Sadly it's true. Professor dudes are jealous and think I'm an uncouth fascist. Professor chicks want some action, and when it is denied to them (professor chicks are normally over 19)....well you know, the saying about a woman scorned.

So the answer is no. As in everything in life, especially in 2021, I must be the ultimate judge of my thoughts, actions and creations. And in the case of the above 2 poems, written by me, they are excellent. In fact they are likely to make it into the upcoming compilation tentatively titled "The Best of James poems , as posted on ec.com".

Yes it's true. We're putting together a best of James' poems compilation. Though Amazon has already banned it ahead of it's publication. They say it discriminates against guys (and the other 12,896,342 genders)....who don't got what it takes to be James (have a harem, write intelligent poetry etc.). Amazon has also investigated the James Harem Charter, and interviewed it's members, and have concluded that The James Harem must be banned also for the fact that the harem practices discrimination against non females, and that within the female gender, the harem practices discrimination based on hotness. It noted that each member is hot, and that thus there is discrimination in play against females who are not hot. And that this discrimination is a blatant infraction of their policies regarding fairness.

When I protested this decision by Amazon, they told me I'd have to submit a report covering the years 1650 to 2021, proving the James Harem never benefited from the institution of slavery, directly or indirectly. Amazon said it adopted this new policy after seeing how well it worked in Chicago, where it scared away the best of Chicago's vendors and suppliers.

So we've decided to market the compilation through the only sane and honest institution left in America: Strip Clubs.

Another thing Lew, if you and Vinnie ever make Trusk/Bundles 2024 a reality, I will let you use some of my poems, for FREE, if you'd like to include them in your campaign speeches. You are welcome in advance.

Anyway Lew, what was the question?   : )

 

I

 

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James   

Here Lew, present this beauty to your professor chick friend:

When Hilary´s in trouble,
I am not slow.
It´s hip, hip, hip,
...ahh, her hips make me "grow".


Underdog, 1964, James, 2021
 

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