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Hello everyone, I'm Shannon Matthews mom. Well before I say anything elsr I wanted you all to know that Matthew is doing really well. he has said that he doesn't even feel like he had brain surgery. And I owe that to all of you.

But now it seems that I have another problem. This is also very hard for me to talk about. I have bipolar and dyscphoic mania. I was taking the medison Depakote for the past year. I then found out that I was pregnant. After I found out I get off the medison right away. But as Shaun{my husband and Kathy lees son} it was not fast enough. We found out that the baby im carring has Spina Bifida.

I have started to do some research and I saw that there are 3 different types of Spina Bifida. Two of them need surgery and the third has really no syptoms at all. We found this out by an ultra sound and tha dr. said that the baby would probably need surgery after its born to correct the gap.

Needless to say im scared out of my mind, and part off me blames myself because of my medication. But I keep being told that its not my fault. Shaun says that i need to talk about this so thats why im starting this post. If anyone has any prayers left in them we could sure use some for our baby. Thanks again and I will post more info on the post as I know more. But I know your all very caring and helpful. Thank you all so much. praypraypray

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Shannon-I want you to know that you and your unborn baby are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that all works out for you, but as I am an OB nurse, I realize that things don't always turn out as we hope. Don't blame yourself about the medication. It may have been something that would have occurred even if you had taken nothing at all for medication. Sometimes, there is a real balancing act between mother needs and baby's needs.

Place your trust in God for guidance and hope. If you need anything, just let me know.

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Shannon, We got some prayers left in us and we will pray for you, Shaun and your baby. Can I encourage you not to fear the worst. I know that's easy for me to say but having been at the birth of a Spina Bifida baby some years ago and knowing that she is now an active and wonderful teenager who outwardly shows no signs of what she had at birth, I know that it can be better than you might expect.

I also work often with folk with varying effects of Spina Bifida and I can assure you they range from those using wheels chairs to those who are active and have only small limitations on what they can physically do. All of them live full lives and are making significant contributions to their community

As Kathy and Laura have said, dont blame yourself, but look forward to the opportunity to care for a unique child that is yours and Shaun's to love forever.

God Bless and keep strong

Muzza and Kiwi

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Thank you all for the support. I now can relax a little. Talking sbout it is starting to help. I still can't say it but at least im making some progress. One thing the doctor did tell us was that the opening is very low on the babys back. By the tailbone, and he said that is the best place for it to be.So we could get lucky and after the surgery to close the opening the baby could be fine. But if the baby does need more that will be ok to. I now can think clearly { well for the most part} I can start planning a little better. I know that the baby will have all the love and support it will be need to be happy. I guess i started having one of my panic attacks that lasted a couple of days.

We have not said anything to Matthew yet because right now he really won't be able to fully understand. Shaun and I plan on explaining to him what going on with the baby after its born. Im in a way happy to know that Muzza knows about it. Maybe we can share infomation. Well I have another ultra sound on Oct. 2 so hopefully we will find out more then. I will get back to you all very soon. Thank you Kathy, Laura,and Muzza for your support and prayers again.

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Hey everyone, we got some good news. Yesterday Shaun called the unsurance company to find out what they all would cover with the baby. They said as long as we have the referals for everything like the surgery and doctors visits, they will cover it all. Shaun even asked if they would cover wheelchairs if the baby does suffer from paralasis and they cover that as well. We just need to have referals for everything. So that news gave us a little break. Now all we have to do is wait till the next ultrasound to see what our next move is.

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