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Black Cloud Over TonyTown...

Tony Cartmill

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So...Last Thursday and Friday, after taking it in the groin for the last couple of months with my IRAs and stocks/funds that were still in the market, I decided to dump about 50% of what was left into cash. And mid-day Friday, I decided to buy about 10% short funds against the market to recoup some of my loses...

BAM! the market rallies some the last part of Friday, I loose some profit from the stocks I sold, and lost some from the shorts I bought...OK, hold what I have and see what happens Monday.

Over the weekend, I played my little football betting site on "sure thing" NFL teaser bets like Washington over lowly St Louis and Carolina and New England to stay within 10 points of Tampa and San Diego...

BAM! Account Balance Sunday Night: $0.00

So, Monday I come into work about 10:AM The Stock Market is booming up over 500 points! My energy and utility funds I dumped on Friday are up 15-20%! My short holdings I bought Friday afternoon are down 7-8% in one day!

I say to myself, "This rally can't hold all this 500, 550, 600 point rally on such mild good news. I think I'll buy some double-short stocks mid-day to make some quick recoup profit when the rally dies in a last-hour sell-off!" I pull the trigger on my hunch. Another grand into the short market at the 560-point entry!

BAM! THE BIGGEST ONE DAY POINT RALLY IN HISTORY, UP 936 POINTS! I loose more retirement savings. I broke even for the day, when most everyone else, who just stayed put, made 10-15% IN 1 FREAKIN' DAY! I could have gotten some of my losses back from the last month of steady declines, BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

So, now that my Retirement is about down to what it was back in 2003, 5 years of 0% net growth because, "I know how to pick 'em and I know when to sell 'em...Does anybody have some advice, before I start looking for a tall building to do a 1929-style high dive off?



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Move on over Tony, and make room on that ledge for me. I'll be glad to hold your hand and we'll jump together.

I had a financial advisor for about 4 years who used to call me once a month and give me the low-down on my accounts. Whatever he touched, turned to gold. Sadly, he went on to bigger and better things. My accounts were turned over to someone else and I'm not too happy with this guy.

I'm too sick about all this to even tell you how much I lost. On Thursday alone, I lost $6000. So, on Friday, I called him and told him to pull everything out and roll it over to a money market fund. And am I glad I listened to my gut feeling because Friday was the worse day. God only knows how much more I would have lost.

I haven't decided what I'm going to do. Stuffing my money in my mattress is one option. But I'll tell you what I WON'T be doing.....I won't be investing in the stock market again UNTIL this blows over. I'll probably roll it over into CD's until the economy is a bit more stable.

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I think I've got a solution Tony..

We (EC.Com board members) all move to a wilderness area in the Rocky Mountains (Tonytown we'd call it), where we'd take care of one another, be immune to stock market swings and live happily ever after (see Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged).

We'd live in a communal meritocracy. Each man would be allowed only one woman (otherwise all the chicks would belong to James). We'd invest in building homes, raising crops and husbanding cattle..

Our mayor (Lew) would have corrupt tendencies, but would be kept in line by the handsome sherriff (James)...

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Yes it's true. Hollies had a score to settle with the handsome sherriff James.

You see, back in the 70s, Hollies went on a date (once). He took his date to the high school dance. After dancing with Hollies, his date was traumatized and immediately applied to, and was accepted in, The James Harem (her mom figured this would be the only way to keep her from forever being ruined for men).

And Hollies never forgets a grudge.

But luckily for James, the evil bandit Austinberries (and Hollies main nemesis)was lying in wait for Hollies as Hollies rode into Tonytown..

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ok, Tony. I have a simple solution for you! My cousin sent me this email just today! Below is what it says:

Thought you would all find this valuable.

If you had purchased $1,000 of AIG stock one year ago, you would have $42 left.

With Lehman, you would have $6.60 left.

With Fannie or Freddie, you would have less than $5 left.

But if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have had $214.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.

It's called the 401-K(eg).....

Sorry...It is kinda cute though, eh?


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Tony, I feel for you, man! Julie's idea isn't half-bad, though.

Two months ago I could have early retired. I chose to keep working for awhile- still enjoy the rush. The retirement fund took a dive, and early retirement is on hold right now.

Kirk and Tony's recycling business- your trash is our cash laugh

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Well, Tony and Dianed...

I have mixed emotions about you guys jumping off the ledge...

On the negative side, you two are a pair of my most favorite posters and I would miss you dearly...BUT

On the positive side, I would move up in the ranks of the funniest EC.com member behind James and Tunes and I REALLY want to be a moderator...

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