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Last Year WAB Real Story


Lew Bundles

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I think its about time we revisited what actually happened at last years WAB before anybody gets that warm and fuzzy feeling...It wasnt all peaches and cream...A quick unearthing of the real story posted last year by the only person who did not have "Rose Colored Glasses" on...

posted 08-29-2006 11:15 AM

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Its time someone spoke up and broke the code of silence about the shenanigans that took place at WAB...My friends, this is the story behind the scenes of some things that happened that will only illustrate that this was not necessarily a "love-in"...

The following events are true and were witnessed by yours truly...

When each one of us arrived, we had to spell our screennames to the person who monitored the front door...I assume this was an attempt to keep the illiterate types away(Cartmill, etc.)

When IRA arrived, Bernie misunderstood the spelling and thought it was the "IRS" and quickly ran upstairs to hide all the cash that he has received from his "Marathon Man" and other capatalistic ventures...

LobsterDave conceded to me that he would never waste REAL lobster on this crew...

Darlene had to convince Bernie to let her bring in her lemonade(He had Kool-Aid and Cyanide ready for the cult members)...

BeatleJays wife did an impromptu table dancing performance in his honor...She, I assume, is much more attractive than he and made me think of two things

1. Why didnt I bring dollar bills...

2. She is so skinny, why did she waste money on a plane ticket, she could have faxed herself over...

Naked Twister DID happen...But the game got off to a delayed start as no one would play once Tommy Tunes arrived with his shorts on...

Speaking of TT, the live "Name That Tune" came to an abrupt halt, when an embarrased Jim Bonfanti couldn't place the opening drum roll on "I Wanna Be With You"...

Ira(who would only drink the new Jewish beer called "HeBrew") back pedalled into the pool...

The sight of Kathy running at full tilt to the grill after Bernie declared "I'm hungry bitch" was a little too disturbing to see...

I spotted the following situations with Bernie's children...Their oldest child was asking the parents if this nonsense was ever gonna end while the youngest was doing shots of Pedialyte...(Kathy's aunt was drinking vodka and prune juice)...

The following announcements were made...

Bernie proclaimed that he was indeed going to start a new religion-"The Church of the Latter Day Raspberries" which prompted Jim to get up and leave...

"Hungryeyes" confimed to a startled crowd that she indeed, was carrying Lew's baby...This caused IRA to backpedal into the pool again ...Needless to say this annoncement will put a damper on the Dianed/Lew wedding announcement...(My comments on that debacle will appear at another time as they are throwing me out of the library for over extending my computer time)...

BERNIE..."It's midnight...Are these freeloaders ever gonna leave"?...

AnnieK took off her shirt and was swinging it over her head during the "Electric Slide"...(She said that it slid right off. Wasnt that the intention of the song?)

At one time or another, every girl there was hitting on me...Kathy's Aunt thought that I was cuter than her first boyfriend(John The Baptist)... Kathy, was calling me by my nickname(Tripod) and Denise was calling me "Fresh Meat"(Hey after 23 years of Al, Millard Fillmore would look supple)...The only chick that didnt throw herself at me was Jim's wife Barb...I went over to her and started to lay my romantic rap on her but she seemed unmoved by it all...Thats when it hit me that she was probably deaf from living with that drumming racket all those years...There you have it...The REAL behind the scene story...Glad to have been able to balance all the "Woodstock" feelings that everyone else portrayed...

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I've been to three "WAB's", and they've all been a lot of fun.

August 11th is the day before my wedding anniversary, and it would be pretty selfish of me to spend it away from home. As it is, my loving and understanding wife has been very accepting of me living out my teenage dreams by travelling from Calgary 4x to see shows in Cleveland (2x), Chicago and NY (2x). She is fully expecting that I'm going to go to shows this year, if they happen. So no "WAB" for me this year.

Marv

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I think Lew is having LSD flashbacks...although the thing with my shirt COULD have happened, although I don't remember due to Simon's Potent Potables. laugh

Tony, I think the real diagnosis is paranoid-delusional. It's OK...we let him play with his MUSICAL equipment and everyone else is safe... happy

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  • 6 years later...

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