Thank you all for the support. I now can relax a little. Talking sbout it is starting to help. I still can't say it but at least im making some progress. One thing the doctor did tell us was that the opening is very low on the babys back. By the tailbone, and he said that is the best place for it to be.So we could get lucky and after the surgery to close the opening the baby could be fine. But if the baby does need more that will be ok to. I now can think clearly { well for the most part} I can start planning a little better. I know that the baby will have all the love and support it will be need to be happy. I guess i started having one of my panic attacks that lasted a couple of days. We have not said anything to Matthew yet because right now he really won't be able to fully understand. Shaun and I plan on explaining to him what going on with the baby after its born. Im in a way happy to know that Muzza knows about it. Maybe we can share infomation. Well I have another ultra sound on Oct. 2 so hopefully we will find out more then. I will get back to you all very soon. Thank you Kathy, Laura,and Muzza for your support and prayers again.