Hi Julia - my sincerest condolences to you and your family. I had the most interesting esperience last night - I went to see John Edward (the TV pyschic "crossing over") with my best friend. Not my idea - I was skeptical. But there was 2,000 people there all hoping and praying to get a message from their deceased loved ones. I have to tell you - it was incredible. If he fakes it with plants in the crowd outside or in the audience and uses an earpiece, he does an AMAZING job. But I can't say it i saw one shred of evidence it was faked. He made a point of saying that what we perceive as suffering at the point of death is not the experience that is relayed from the dead. It was a quick "tug" and then the person was away from the finale of the body dying. He was very comforting, very very funny and it made the inevitable act of dying more palatable, if that doesn't sound too weird. The main point was to celebrate the life of your loved ones and don't dwell on the 60 seconds that we perceived a hellish transition. I hope it helps, that really is my intent on mentioning it - I think it will mean more in the long term and not today, it's too soon. But I'm thinking of you just the same.