Jump to content
Lew Bundles

3rd DEFENDANT:DIANED CALLED TO THE STAND

Recommended Posts

PLEASE STATE YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS...

DD...My name is Diane D and I come from New Yawk...Long Island...

IS THAT THE SAME AS NEW YORK?

DD...Yes...

AND WHERE IS THAT LOCATED?

DD:...Just south of the city...

OH, ITS STILL THERE. I THOUGHT THEY MOVED IT...

DD...No, don’t be an a-hole...Are you still sore because I didn’t marry you at WAB?...

LC, PLEASE TAKE OVER THE QUESTIONING AS I BELIEVE WE HAVE A CONFLICT OF INTEREST...

LC...OK...MISS D...YOU WERE A FORMER MODERATOR ON THE BOARD...WHY DID YOU ABANDON YOUR DUTIES...?

DD...Well, as you know, I was supposed to marry Lew at WAB but decided not to...I got one look at him in the grass skirt and it changed my mind...You see it was at that moment that I realized that...

LC...HE LOOKED BETTER THAN YOU IN A SKIRT?

DD...No, I realized that I hated him...I hated him because he wasn’t man enough to hold onto Lewisa, his ex-wife...

LC...WERE YOU JEALOUS OF LEWISA?...

DD...No, I HATE her and I hate Lew...You see, if Lew could have held onto her, then he wouldn’t have lost her...

LC...I AM NOT FOLLOWING THIS...YOU HATE HIM BECAUSE HIS EX WIFE LEFT HIM?

DD...Yes, because he lost her to (sob, dob, sob)...James...And I have always been in love with James...

LC...Did you ever let James know how you felt?

DD...Yes...I applied to be in his harem thousands of times, but was always rejected...He has this stupid age policy that if you were over 18, you were disqualified...I tried everything to act younger...I went to Chuck E Cheese, I watched Full House, I began drinking vodka and pedialyte, But the rejection letters kept coming...First, they were normal rejection form letters.”thank you for your interest, but...” kind of thing...Then they turned nasty...Ben Gay scented letters, prune juice stains, pictures of a water bed with the heading “Lake Placid,”...Pictures Of Uncle Tahnoose and Bennett Cerf...a can of Enddust...and the ultimate insult, a bag of his toe nail clippings, with a video of Lewisa actually snipping them...and that’s the reason I abandoned ec.com...a broken heart...

LC...YOU MAY STEP DOWN...

There you have it voters...guilty or not guilty...?

  • Haha 6
  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

elle4ec   
4 hours ago, LC said:

Heart-wrenching testimony!

It may have been “Heart-wrenching” testimony, LC, but I almost busted a gut laughing while reading it!! Lew is still in rare form and at the top of his comedic game! Surely Bernie would not let hilarious talent such as this fine example, be silenced!!🤣🙏🙏

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
James   

Great one Lew! And this one was special because it included my favorite subject (James).

Anyway, DianeD is good people, she has a lot of spunk, a never say die attitude. We at The James Harem, while rejecting her membership application 13,486 times, always admired her.

In fact we even gave her an award as the rejectee we most respected!

The award was called "The little engine...........that couldn't.

P.S. Hope she's doing well.

: )

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
dianed   

Oh Lew….I can see your wittiness has gotten better with age. 

I know I haven’t been around in a very, very long time. Days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months…well, you know the rest.  I have been extremely busy working.  I started working for myself some years ago and it has blossomed into something I could never imagine.  I worked my butt off to get to where I am now and it has paid off but the hours are long…16 hours a day, 7 days a week.

It’s sad to see this board coming to an end.  Even though I haven’t been around, it was nice to know it was always there.   I have formed wonderful friendships through here and I still keep in touch with many people.  We may not speak every week or so, but always pick up where we left off.

Craig:  Vodka and PediaLyte is delish !!  Try it sometime!

Oh….and James…FYI….This “little engine” could, would, and still does !!

 

 

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
James   

That's so very cool about your business Diane. My hat's off to you. The world needs more good people like you to be in charge of things.

P.S. You may be telling the truth about the "still does" thing, ....... a friend of mine who travels New England a bunch told me he sees your name a lot, ...at truck stops......on the mens' bathroom walls.

: )

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


×